Grow From Failure

You can assess your mistakes however you choose. But if you choose to look at them as courageous, as willing to try, as a lesson in waiting, you may also begin to feel differently about them. Of course, we also make mistakes out of haste, ignorance, and negativity….but there is something to gain there too.

Daily Moment of Awareness [10.20.2019]

Moments of awareness shared with you

While we enjoy the majesty of this life, we will also experience pain. We all will. There is no avoiding it. In fact, a life spent trying to avoid pain leads to suffering.

Pain happens, whether unexpected (loss of a loved one, natural disaster, etc.) or as a result of our own doing (ruminating in resentment, allowing fear to influence our choices, etc.). The lesson is no matter the source of pain, it’s how (or if) we decide to face it that will shape us. Choosing not to embrace pain will lead to suffering. Facing pain in unhealthy ways (through numbing = drugs, sleep, pretending, etc.) will also lead to suffering. And it is suffering that gives pain power to manipulate you into believing you cannot heal.

Pain is another experience we must move through. Don’t get wrapped up in the pace of it. Do notice if you are stagnating.

Give action to pain. Ask for help (friend, family, counseling, etc.) Meditate. Pray. Journal. Engage in healthy activities (exercise, reading, walking, etc.). Other forms of action include: expressing your truth, acceptance, forgiveness, love.

Move through your pain so you can heal in love.

Daily Moment of Awareness [10.14.2019]

Moments of awareness shared with you


Maybe it’s not work. Maybe it’s not grueling. Maybe it’s not exhausting.

Maybe….it’s necessary.

When you consider making change in your life, do you cast a negative shadow on the experience? Like, before you even take a step? Think about how you characterize what you need to do or what you are trying to achieve. The more you paint it in a negative light, the more mental blocks you create to get in the way. As if you needed any more excuses.

When you reflect on areas of your life that you believe to be unhealthy or in need of a healthy dose of change, it is helpful to think and speak about the change in a grounding and benefiting way. Ask for the effort and energy needed to move forward. Allow lessons along the way. Be patient with yourself. Say, “Thank you.” for the opportunity.

You affect the process of change by your attitude about change. See it as necessary and welcome it as part of your growth.


Daily Moment of Awareness [10.1.2019]

Moments of awareness shared with you

I have been enjoying a pretty steady ritual of daily morning meditation, followed by reading, then a run, then some social media work and then….well, whatever I need to do in the moments following.

Today was completely lopsided for me. I was up super late and basically, so my sleep schedule was totally messed up. I actually laid in bed until about 5p. Though I was feeling conflicted about some stuff, unmotivated, and annoyed that I allowed the day to go by, something happened.

I told myself it was ok to deviate from the plan. I recognized I could still accomplish what I do in the mornings, in the evening too. In that moment, I felt ok about not feeling ok. But I also become mindful that making healthy choices to boost my energy, clear my mind, and nurture my well-being are available to me in every moment - not just the morning time.

So, I sat up. I scheduled some social media posts. I leaned into my mediative practice. I read. I got a quick run in. I showered. And I even ran out for some quick fall knick-knack shopping.

Even when things feel off, you can still make choices to align yourself with well-being.

Daily Moment of Awareness [9.30.2019]

Moments of awareness shared with you

Meditation is an experience which gives the individual the opportunity to see oneself. Unfiltered. Non-judged. Without fear.

This does not mean it is without intense emotion, but it is emotion grounded in how you see yourself. This is powerful. Many of us chip away (sometimes strip away) our authenticity in order to be accepted, to be loved, or we do it to be invisible. We then begin to see ourselves as others want to see us.

My meditative practice has been about eight years in the making. Where I am at is leaps and bounds from where I began. But what I realized today is, when I meditate I am seeing and feeling my authentic self. It’s liberating. It’s inspiring.

I’m also reminded I have work to do, but I’m not embarrassed by it. I am accepting of it. I am accepting of me.

What Are You Telling Yourself?

Are you aware of the dialogue you spin in your head?

Are you rehashing a painful, past experience?

Are you doubting yourself?

Are you replaying somebody’s harsh judgment of you?

Are you what if’ing yourself into an oblivion?

Are you judging others?

Are you amplifying your fears and piggybacking them with anger?

Are you aware you can change all of that?

words + words on image: Michael Barata / image: Henry Be

words + words on image: Michael Barata / image: Henry Be


How You Frame It

Your inner dialogue greatly influences your mood, your behavior, and your outlook about life.

If you are forever re-running something painful from your past in your head, don’t be surprised when the emotions associated with that experience are what you feel. If you doubt yourself or harshly judge yourself, don’t be surprised when you feel “less than.” If you are always giving into fear and telling yourself, “I just couldn’t do that.” don’t be surprised when you don’t make progress.

If you are going through a challenge, how you think and talk about it, matters. A lot! How you frame it is how your whole being responds to it. If you refer to your life (experiences) in a negative and/or defeating way, you will attract more negativity and defeat and feel negative and defeated.

It’s not magic. It’s not being naive. It’s not ignoring the work. It’s all about taking a healthy approach to your life in every moment. Everything you could ever feel or give begins within YOU.

If you’re hurting, acknowledge the hurt, and tell yourself you are healing. If you’re lost, acknowledge being lost, and tell yourself you’re learning. Of course, reinforcing this healthy mindset with healthy behaviors in healthy environments will also help.

words on image: Michael Barat / image: Pixabay

words on image: Michael Barat / image: Pixabay

Begin With YOU

We can spend so much time and energy wondering what others are saying about us. If you’re not there, you’ll  never know the what, the intent, or even the sincerity. It’s ok to not know.

What you do have complete control over is your own self-dialogue and how you express yourself to the world. 

We tend to forget or hide ourselves in the curiosity of “the other.” Why? Because sometimes being you can be excruciatingly vulnerable and scary as hell. But it can also be magical, freeing, and healthy. Yes. It can be ALL of that and more if you choose it. 

Find yourself. Accept yourself. Love yourself. For all that is unique and beautiful about you. That all begins within you - not with the other.

words: Michael Barata / image: Leah Kelley

words: Michael Barata / image: Leah Kelley

The Choice Is You

Another year…..of reflecting on the last year. Another year….to plan (and hope) to make your life different.

image: Jenna Hamra

image: Jenna Hamra

Maybe you want to change your health, change your relationship, change your career, or change some kind of behavior. The reality is, it’s not the calendar that can help you achieve that. It’s YOU. Only you. We have been and always will be the one person who holds ourselves back or moves ourselves forward.

Rather than looking at the calendar and choosing a gym, choosing a partner, choosing a new career, or choosing a new lifestyle, look in a mirror, instead, and choose YOU.

The Next Chapter

One day back in 2006, I was sitting at my desk at work and something just felt off. The whole work-life balance buzz was popping up here and there, and honestly, I didn't even know what that meant. So, I googled it. There were many results. But one jumped out at me. It was an article in Business Week entitled, "Smashing The Clock."

I read it and IT CHANGED MY LIFE! The article was about Best Buy's implementation of the Results-Only Work Environment. What stood out to me was how this approach to work (and life) was grounded in trust. Of course, a mind shift journey of this magnitude can be disruptive, liberating, and transformative. Well, I got it. I felt it. I connected to it and I wanted it! 

I began reading and commenting on the ROWE blog - a lot! I had the book, "Why Work Sucks and How To Fix It" mailed to me (it was autographed too!!!!). At the same time, I was requesting a ROWE-like experience where I was employed. It didn't happen. Fast-forward to three years later and I was hired by the co-founders/co-creators of ROWE, Cali Ressler & Jody Thompson, to be a ROWE facilitator as part of a N.I.H. research project studying workplace culture and health. The study lasted for two years. MY LIFE CHANGED AGAIN!!!!

After the study ended, so many things happened with regard to my career path. Over the next seven years, I never lost sight of ROWE and how it changed my like and how I believed it can change the lives of others. I began teaching college psychology with a ROWE mindset. I worked as a return specialist with a ROWE mindset. I was a beertender with a ROWE mindset. In 2017, I was hired as General Manager to manage a craft beer garden, a fitness center, a cafe, and a restaurant (slated to open in 2019). And yes, I still have a ROWE mindset. 

That's me with Jody enjoying a layover! 

That's me with Jody enjoying a layover! 

And then....I received some social media messages from Jody Thompson about a possible BIG opportunity. We scheduled a call and I listened. And just like back in 2009, I said, "YES!!!!!" I'm on board as a Master Trainer for CulureRx shifting mindsets and facilitating adaptive change in Canada. Yes. ROWE in Canada! 

I'm still a General Manager too. So, the next few months are sure to be fun. I hope you enjoy reading about my journey....

Your Truth Matters

The last several months have been…a whirlwind. That seems to be the word I most often come back to. 

In that whirlwind, life has been crazy active, super joyous, very gratifying, and intensely inspirational. However, it has also been quite challenging, overwhelming, frustrating, sad, and downright painful. 

And through that whirlwind, here I am. 

My marriage ended. I moved (albeit next-door to my previous home). Another year of teaching ended. My career path shifted - like BIG! Relationships changed. My family’s resilience was tested. I cried a lot. I questioned my purpose. I questioned positivity and optimism. I was gifted with grace from others. I was blessed to realize I had a great deal to be grateful for. 

A few weeks ago, I watched a video about motivation and hesitation. After watching it, I believe my lesson from the whirlwind was revealed. And that lesson is, if my truth matters to me, I need to live it. 

I am not suggesting the mistakes I’ve made, the wrongs I’ve done, the people I’ve disappointed were all the result of me not living my truth. I own that I knowingly made bad decisions in my life - probably will make a few more. But I also believe I gave myself time, space, and attention to confront, understand, learn, and grow from them. That will be a forever kind of deal. 

Now back to living my truth. I realized I am turning a page, beginning a new chapter in my life. With that, I made a conscious agreement with myself to make healthier decisions in all areas of my life. And I cannot do this without first being truthful with myself and then with others. 

Simply put, live truthfully, no matter what. 

It’s the “no matter what” part that makes it so tricky. I recognized how I was allowing fear of the unknown to deny myself of my worthiness in the now. It just clicked. I can no longer allow perceived reactions of others or hypothetical outcomes to deter me of living my truth in the present moment.  

I also realized living your truth does not have to be confrontational. You can express it in a thoughtful manner. Think about it lovingly. Speak it politely. Live it compassionately. 

In the video, Mel Robbins discusses how we are wired to protect ourselves. In other words, the neuroscience of fear. Therefore, once your brain detects your uneasiness about anything, it does all it can to protect you. In that moment, many of us decide not to do something. You know, the big put off. The, “I’ll wait till I'm really ready.” Or my favorite, “Timing is everything. It’ll happen when it’s supposed to happen.” 

As of late, I have been denying the hesitation and instead, consciously reminding myself of my truth and why it matters to me. It has been nerve-racking at times, but it has also felt so freeing. And yes, sometimes hesitation still wins. 

The short of it, my relationship with my ex-wife is blossoming into something beautiful, my career is moving in a very exciting direction, my interactions with others have improved, but most important, I am focused on accepting my truth….so I can live my truth. 

Stay tuned…

Peaceful Transitions

Awareness is like learning. It's a movement. From moments of focus to experiences of emotional fluctuation, there is a flow. We may not always agree with the timing of it all, but life is life. 

Today, I noticed how I can be an obstacle in my flow. I attach instead of accept. I hold instead of let go. And then I become impatient with everything. But today something happened. Something noticeable. I felt peaceful.

We all have a story unfolding. This story has contained so many twists and turns, beautiful joys and devastating pains, unknowns and lessons learned. But our stories share a common experience - change. 

Today, my changes felt like peaceful transitions. And I was grateful.